To Tell or Not to Tell?

What would you do? If you found out something, that was a violation of trust and respect, that your best friends partner was doing, would you tell? Do you make the decision to tell them and run the risk that you will forever alter their life as they know it by telling them a devastating secret that only you can tell? Or do you continue to let them live the lie believing that nothing is wrong?

In all honesty I don't know. I mean I know that deep down no matter how much it hurt that I would want to know, because it is my right to know, because it is my life and no one else's? Shouldn't I have the right to know if someone is lying to me? Don't I have the right to direct my own life no matter how hard I have had it in the past?

At the end of the day I believe that people rise to the challenge, and that as is our human right, we will defend ourselves. That we will prosper rather than whimper in the corner like a beaten dog, we will do whatever it takes to make sure that we survive.

I hope and I pray that if something like this happens to me, that my dearest friend would say something to me, because the pain of finding out that my dearest friend allowed a lie to be perpetuated for a long time would be even worse than finding out about the actual problem, no matter how insurmountable it may be. I deserve the right to run my life and to gather as much information to make my own decisions.

The Waiting Room

Is it just me or are more women waiting around for Mr. Right? Could it be the over abundance of women in the world? Or could it be that while our mothers were burning their bras the men were burning their briefs. It is almost as if when women, said we want more opportunities than just getting married and pumping out babies, that men said well if you want options then I get them too damnit! And if I really think about how many couples I see that are really, truly in love, in all honesty there aren’t many. Most of them look like they settled right into it, and those folks are the ones that end up divorced after two kids and the house in the suburbs. I am sure everyone has friends like these, you know the people that are college sweethearts. I know this sounds bad but I would stack their years of togetherness and supposed love, against a man who cheated on his wife and then left her for the same woman he cheated with. I mean think about it, he actually took the time to deconstruct the life that he had carefully planned with another. Now I am not saying that true love can only be born out of sacrifice, or that you can’t recognize it if you haven’t felt the pain of rejection, in any form, whether from a no-call dude or a man who has walked away. But you have to admit it certainly makes it easier to recognize.

I think the rest of us that are here in this waiting room are the ones that are waiting for the fairytale. So is it better to be in the waiting room or one of the settlers?

Honestly I have no idea, but what I do know is that I am done waiting, I am done thinking about this problem. Maybe I will die with 50 dogs and cats, but it has to be better than the hell of deconstructing your life with someone that you settled for. And for those of you settlers that are sleeping on a Sunday night, while I tap away on my laptop, I know you think you got the better end of the stick. But I would also bet that you didn’t get laid and that your wife or husband has their back to you and you to them. At the end of the day as I snuggle down with my cat and dog, at least I know the only thing that would make them leave is death, because lets face it there love is the easiest unconditional love anyone will ever find or have.

So in my first post of the new year, Good Luck to both the settlers and the waiting room crowd, because like the Obama campaign I believe in Change as well.